26 November 2008

happy thanksgiving

I've been busy.
Hope you have a good thanksgiving. Check back this weekend. I'll have something. Better than this, anyway.
love you.

21 November 2008

Organized Labor

I guess the Attractive Girls Union is driving a hard bargain.
"No hope of success unless there's a large influx of money, or he joins a band."

Note the chart at about the 2:50 mark.

20 November 2008

Jimmie Johnson handles boner question well

NASCAR would be better if drivers showed some personality, maybe some sense of humor. There's too much money at stake now, so you get drivers like Jeff Gordon, who is often described as "remarkably lifelike". Rumor is that Gordon is a funny, entertaining guy behind closed doors, but we'll never know. Supposedly Carl Edwards is a fucking psycho, but we've got that on video.

Anyway, here's Jimmie Johnson giving a dumb question an appropriate answer. Hooray for personality!

19 November 2008

Dispatch from the Frozen North

It's going to be another 80 degree day in Sunny Southern California. Apparently they get weather in other parts of the country. We only get Hot and Windy. With a 100% chance of Ashy. This from my friend in New York:

Well, it is the second straight day of snow and I am told this is nothing. If it gets much deeper, you will not be able to find my Jack and Maddie [pictured]. We might have to put tracking devices on them and teach Splash how to find them.

Big news in small things

We had dude day this past weekend. That's when the married guys get a hall pass and get a chance to chain-drink beers with the guys that don't need permission to do those kinds of things. The married guys tend to fall into two categories: 1) the sprinters, who pass out early, b) the committed, who stay up until 3 AM. I was neither; I left at 9.

My friend Jimmy didn't make it. He had had to attend the birth of his child. Man that guy is whipped. Where are his priorities? Katherine Ann arrived on Friday night @ 11:47 PM. I ordered her one of these (is that a onesie?), and also a 'creeper', and one of these, because it comes with matching 49ers booties. I've got the sizes covered from newborn to 12 months. Awesome. Can't wait until she barfs on it.

I need to get this girl started out right. Her dad is a Detroit Lions fan (seriously) and those team colors are ugly. She is beautiful and deserves better. He's also a USC fan, so it's an uphill battle.

17 November 2008

Backup dancing is fun

Here's JT doing a cameo on SNL this weekend. One good thing about the bad SNL is you don't have to wait up on Saturday night to watch it. If there's a funny skit then someone will post it.

13 November 2008

Monetize your blog

The title of this post is a joke because 'monetizing your blog' is a whole cottage industry. Nice work if you can get it, but we're offering a free service here at GJAW. We're not for sale!

The Dutch as a people do a lot of things well. They are tall. They are good at soccer. They have names with lots of vooweels stuuck toogeetheer. (See whaat I diid theere?) And they are good at making money with free software: check it! Bitchin!

Image only makes sense in the context of the 'making money with free software' link, but if you don't want to click through it's also an excellent example of why mathematicians use fractals to compute the length of rough spaces (like coastlines). The non-math reason is the shorter a yardstick you use to measure, the longer a value you get. Tricky!

How big is the whale?

Philly is famous for booing Santa Claus. They were more kind to the toddler. Video taken at the Phillies World Series celebration parade.

12 November 2008

"the bums told Schulz these are prime seats"

Ze Germans.

Puppies are tasty

This courtesy a link from the Draplin Design Company. Yes that's a weiner dog puppy in a hot dog bun.

Someone posted it to the FFFFOUND website. Officially it's from "Lisa Marie's Facebook page". Whatever. It's cute, if you're into that. And I know you are. awwwwww...

11 November 2008

I used to love watching football

I used to love watching football. I came of age during the 80's and 90's, when the 49ers had some pretty good players and very good teams. They went from one hall of fame quarterback to another. That happens all the time, right? No? Oh.

The 49ers were the team of my grandfather, known around the neighborhood for shouting "TITTLE YOU BUM!" at the grainy television in his house in Redwood City. That would have been from 1951-1960. The man was, how to put this?, a little intense. It's not exaggerating to say that the Niners success in the 80's brought some peace to his life.

They were the team of my mother, who had a crush on Joe Montana that started in 1981 and continues to this day. (She never really had a heart for Steve, mostly because he just... wasn't Joe; I'm guessing this is more or less the story of Steve's career.)

And they were my team. I started losing interest right around the time Terrell Owens decided to read his own press. I was never super committed to the team itself; I was enamored with the players and people that comprised the team. One by one they retired, left as free agents, or were cut. I always thought loyalty to the 'team' is a joke, since it's really just a business venture in matching outfits. And the past 8-10 years for the niners have been abysmal.

And yet...

I forgot how much I enjoyed it until last night, when the 49ers were on Monday Night Football and I was home to watch the game. The spectacle! The action! The shiny maroon & gold and white uniforms of the 49ers on my HD television! Back and forth action on the field, conflict on the sidelines, a game in doubt until the final seconds! "My" team sharted away a win in the final seconds but I couldn't resist it. I forgot how much I used to love watching football.

Now if they could just get Joe to come out of retirement...

07 November 2008

I forgot to mention: BARACK OBAMA FTMFW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My faith in the voting public is not completely restored. You cannot have any confidence in a group that elected GW Bush once, never mind twice. But it's a step in the right direction.

If you don't share my enthusiasm, you can take comfort in the fact that it's going to be an extraordinarily difficult presidency. It ain't much but it'll have to do for now.

Gears2 came out today. I'm headed to Best Buy to add it to the catalog.
Unrelated: Paper Trail is a pretty good record. That guy (or his producers) know how to write a hook.

05 November 2008

A Proclamation

This from Coudal Partners:


WHEREAS The Fourth Day of November in the year 2008 represents the long-awaited resolution to the fiercely contested Presidential election.

WHEREAS By nature of Mr. Obama’s residency and its proud Democratic tradition, the great city of Chicago finds itself squarely at the center of attention on this momentous day.

WHEREAS No municipal or government body has shown the foresight or fortitude to state what needs to be stated.

NOW THEREFORE WE, Coudal Partners, do hereby proclaim that


WHEREAS All employees are hereby required to report for work at the regularly appointed time and subsequently spend the morning hours unfettered by any assignment or memo, conversing with coworkers and furiously surfing political blogs for the latest information.

WHEREAS It would be nice if someone brought bagels.

WHEREAS Commencing at the hour of lunch, all employees will be set free from obligation, to leave the workplace and join friends and family at places of community and conviviality.

WHEREAS An exception will be made for those employees in “battleground states” with certain disagreeable political leanings who are required to arrive at work before the polls open and work until they have closed, without a lunch break and under constant supervision.

WHEREAS For everyone else in Chicago, we will see you at Grant Park. In all other American burgs, villages and hamlets, pretty much anywhere with a television is acceptable. Bowling alleys, rec rooms, firehouses and taverns are a few suggested venues.

WHEREAS Employers not obeying this proclamation are forewarned that they will find the day without productivity or profit and in the end only earn the ire of their tireless and devoted workers.

WHEREAS By the authority vested in us by us, all employees in the U.S.A. are encouraged to forward this proclamation to their supervisors and if there is some doubt about said supervisors agreeableness to follow the guidelines stated herein they are further advised, in the great tradition of American Democracy, to take matters into their own hands and sneak out the back door at lunchtime leaving this web page open on their computer as a statement of their whereabouts and intentions.

WHEREAS Employers are also advised to allow great leniency for late arrivals on the morning of the Fifth Day of November.

Signed and Stated by Coudal Partners, 31 October 2008

If I had to choose one or the other

Looks like Prop 8 is going to pass with a 52/48 margin in CA. That strikes me as odd considering the state went for Obama almost 2 to 1 (61/37). I'm disappointed but I'll get over it. Marriage is protected. Thank God. Or Thor. Or y*hweh. Or whatever. They're all the same to me.

The upside is that Obama won the election. There's a lot of ink being spilled about that right now, but this was my favorite:

At the start of his campaign, Obama often concluded his speeches by telling the story of his Senate campaign and how he prevailed in the southern part of Illinois despite its history of antipathy towards blacks. He cited Martin Luther King Jr., who said, "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends towards justice." On Tuesday, 221 years after the adoption of a Constitution that allowed slavery to continue, an African-American won the presidency. In Grant Park, as Barack Obama left the stage, you could see that arc bend.