04 March 2019

I Went There: Israel

A couple weeks ago my boss asked me if I could visit the mothership in Tel Aviv. I said yes (in my experience best practice is to say yes when your boss asks you to do something, because can-do attitude and all that), and so I went.

I was gone for a total of 8 days, with two travel days on the bookend, 5 days of work, and one day of sightseeing at the end. It was an interesting visit, although the work was grueling. They didn’t fly me all the way out there to take it easy, and I work at a startup so there is a lot of urgency. That meant that the days were pretty long. On top of that the jet lag was brutal, and my typical pattern for the week was to wake up between 3 and 4 in the morning, read or zone out on the internet until the gym opened at 6, hit the crummy hotel workout space to move around a little, get cleaned up and have breakfast, and then head into the office. At the end of the day I would just come back to the hotel and fall asleep without dinner. just collapse, exhausted. 

So it was not a great ‘visit’ to Tel Aviv, but it was a productive work week. I was able to do some sightseeing and visit Jerusalem on the last day I was there. That was cool to see and do. I got there early, and it was cold as hell and raining, so not many people were in the streets of either Jerusalem proper or the old city. Walking empty streets that are two thousand years old is a rare experience, and I enjoyed it. The old city is both a holy site and a constant hustle, and I got the hard sell at both the Jaffa Gate on my way into the old city, and again from a booze-smelling semi-ordhodox guy while I was standing in front of the Western Wall. It’s a living I guess. 

Sightseeing in Jerusalem was a highlight. The actual city is beautiful, with lovely architecture and a very cool market that is apparently packed most days. It was beyond crowded on the day I was there, so that was fun. Very middle eastern bazaar type feel in that place. I think it was Mehane Yehuda (sp?). Highly recommended. 

Other highlights included walking home from dinner (one of only two times I ate dinner in the week I was there) on Rothschild Street in Tel Aviv and seeing enormous bats flying around the trees and near the lamps. Didn’t expect that, but it was great. It was downtown, right in the middle of a busy area. No one paid any attention, but I was pumped. 

Overall the food was great. I think as far as cuisines go the Israeli mediterranean style is probably my favorite overall. Lots of fresh food, not much beef. They do eat a lot of bread. Like, so much bread. But if you skip that you’re in pretty good shape with your everyday diet. The breakfast buffet at my hotel was next level. They had three or four kinds of cured fish every morning, which I loved. And they had 10 kinds of cheese, which I did not. But still: 10 kinds of cheese! For breakfast! Mainly they had a nice assortment of salads and some eggs, plus some pastries. It was my biggest meal of the day, and very tasty. 

Jaffa, an old section of south Tel Aviv, was nice, I guess? I wasn’t impressed, but it’s a thing people visit. Other stuff I missed was the thriving nightlife and bar scene. Experienced none of that, as I was either tired or not much interested in being the solo guy at a bar. I hear it’s great, but a work trip is work, so that was the priority. 

The bus drivers on my ride to and from Jerusalem were super nice. So were all the people that I met individually for work. I mention this because the people in Tel Aviv were generally rude as hell. It’s a culture thing, but by Western standards they are discourteous assholes. Be prepared for that going in and you kind of get used to it. Kind of. 

Getting around was easy enough - much of it is walkable. There is a lot of construction and weak public transport so everyone takes their electric bikes everywhere. No uber, so you just have to order a taxi or pound the pavement. Some Taxi drivers will give you static about paying with a credit card, which is funny because that’s the reason I stopped taking taxis years ago. This is one of the things that a taxi driver of mine was rude about, and while I don’t know how to tell someone to go F yourself in Hebrew, I think he got the message. (For the record, I would like to pay in cash, but I am not going to eat the exchange rate on a company expense. Also if I do that I have to front the money, instead of putting it on my cc and getting reimbursed and paying my bill. So: no.) 

Getting there and back is a punishment. My flights home are 12 hours from Tel Aviv to Newark, and then almost six hours from Newark to Santa Ana. Ouch. As I type this I have four hours to go on the first leg of my return flight, and I have already been on the plane for 8 hours. Fuuuuuuck me. And no, I did not get to fly business class. 


That’s that for now. I hope you had a good week.