I CAN'T WAIT FOR YOU TO OPERATE

How to make a proper bootleg, in 3 not-so-easy steps:

1. Keep the best part of the original. That's usually the hook or, in this case, the legendary, unmistakable, world-beating vocal. You don't know what song this is if you're hearing it for the first time in a mix, and you hear a muffled "oooohhh" and you say, wait, was that?? Could it be? Nahhh. And then as soon as you hear 'BaaaaaayyyyyyyyBEEEE' BOOM YOUR FUCKING HEAD EXPLODES.

2. Put some bounce in it.

3. Crush.

Throw this on and let it wash over you. I dare you not to dance. Every time you play this jam somebody gets pregnant. Could be me. I don't even know.

My neighbors hate me right now. Do I turn it down? Close the window?
WRONG ANSWER. I TURN IT UP.

Because I'M HOT JUST LIKE AN OVEN, I NEED SOME LOVIN'.

Free download too. You're welcome.  

Bring the Noise, with a Side of Cheese

My list of saccharine-sweet white-guy-music guilty pleasures has, at varying times, included some pretty damn suspect bands. Like, really suspect. I once paid good green American money for a Nickelback record. Which, in terms of discriminating taste, is equivalent to eating at a Taco Bell inside a Wal-Mart that shares a parking lot with McDonalds. There are numerous other dated examples.

I have a strong feeling that this remix is one of those tracks I will look back on and say, man, how did I listen to that shit? Because it's classic white-guy-music mixed with some mega-cheese synth trance? What the fuck?

But then I listen to it and it's great. So here we are. Judge all you want; I'll be over in the corner, getting my dance on.

I CAN'T HEAR YOU - THERE'S TOO MUCH AWESOME IN MY EARS.  AWESOME-Y? AWESOME-ISH? STILL CAN'T HEAR YOU.
CALL BACK TOMORROW.

Pump up Jamz

Not sure if the above will work for you, but in the event that it doesn't, you can open this link in a different tab and that will give you the scoop. 

Joined a new gym. Old gym was great until they converted the yoga studio into a barre studio. That is good for membership because barre is all the rage right now. I told them to suck it because I'm there for quality yoga and the yoga instruction has been in steady decline for about a year. Anyway, I joined a crossfit gym and it's good. Tough workouts. And I don't have to wear a shirt, which is nice.

One area where the crossfit gym is really falling down is the music. They got the stereo working but there's not much consistency in the pump up jamz. I find a wide range of pump-up jamz acceptable: rock, punk, techno, hard house, hard trance and rap all have something to offer your PUJ playlist. You know what doesn't work? Country music. I can't name a single pump-up country song and you can't either. It just doesn't work. I understand you can't please everybody but if you're playing country songs and I'm trying to lift weights then you're just making it tougher.

Here's a fun bootleg pump-up jam that claims to be 'progressive house', which I guess means that it's a hard trance track with a vocal in it. No idea. There's a lot of overlap with these things. The song is kind of confused in that it:
- Starts out with a catchy vocal (~ 50 secs)
- Hints at the superbly catchy bass line for a build (1:30)
- Goes into a nice bit of song proper with the bass line (1:45)
- Motors along for a while successfully with the vocal (1:45-3:40)
- Suddenly throws in a full on, straight up, trance-style super-synth Rank-1-Airwave-cribbed breakdown @ 3:45. Which, for the record, is very well executed.
- Then the bass drops again (4:28) and IT IS FUCKING ON until 5:30 when you better be queuing up something else because the outro is short. 

Even though this song is kind of all over the place the individual elements are so good that it doesn't matter. Turn it up and you'll see what I mean.

Not sure I'm going to bring this to Crossfit Balboa. They're not ready. Play this song on half volume during a warmup and it'll fall flat. Play it when you're in the middle of a tough workout (or a big night out) and it'll melt your face off.