10 Years Ago (this April) Danny MacAskill Broke the Internet

This is pre-Red Bull sponsorship, and it announced MacAskill to the world outside of street trials. It remains one of the best trick videos ever, exceeded only by Road Bike Party 1 and 2*, and by the big budget video he did the year after this came out, Way Back Home.

Enjoy again if you have already seen it once. His style has changed since then - he rides mountain bikes now, and does not do as many spin tricks, nor does he jump as high or as far. This is vintage Danny, a bit more raw than in later years, but every bit as good.

* Danny's part in Road Bike Party 2 is absurd. 

The Definition of Insanity

The ignorant cliche that 'Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity' has become very common. It is also wrong. 

There is a very long and detailed reference manual with a great many definitions of insanity. The manual is so comprehensive that it aims to list them all. The above is not one of them. 

Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is the definition of STUPIDITY. 

Another example of stupidity: Repeating tired and inaccurate cliches that you saw on Facetagram and Twit. Please stop. Do it for the children. 

More Books! The Emperor of All Miseries

I read the Emperor of All Maladies over the course of a few weeks. It is excellent, and I think that it is one of those books that everyone should read. Over the course of your life you and/or someone you know will get cancer, and this is a good primer on what that means. It may be that you have already had that experience, and in that case you can probably give it a hard pass, because you don't want to live it again. If not, then consider it a primer on a future problem. You can learn it now, at your leisure, or later, under duress.

My issue with the book is that it does not do enough to describe the miseries of the people afflicted. It would be impossible to read if it did, but the consequences of a cancer diagnosis, and the subsequent treatments, and the relapse, are profound. 

This is a book where everyone dies. Sometimes that gets lost in the clinical language and the 'successes' offered by the treatments. Mukherjee does good work to address the challenges of the treatments, and they toll they take on the body, but I think a more critical assessment is necessary. 

If you suffer terribly to extend your life another six, twelve, or 18 months and then your cancer returns (as it often does), then was that really a 'success'? I do not think so. The brutal truth is that at some point most people in the United States will have to make a decision, either for themselves or for someone they love. That was the hardest fact about the book, and that is why you should read it. 

Commercial Success: We'll Keep This Brief

I guess there was a football game yesterday? Whatever. During the game they showed some advertisements, which are mostly forgettable. However, I have been on the receiving end of this kind of text more than a few times, so the commercial made me laugh. Welcome to Monday.

To the Books! Metro 2033

tl;dr review for Metro 2033: Don't bother.

I heard that Metro 2033 was hugely popular in Russia and elsewhere, and decided to give it a read. It is not a good book. My translation was shockingly bad, which didn't help, but even allowing for a very clumsy and budget printing and translation it still was not good. Too long, too many dream sequences that do nothing to advance the plot, too many improbable rescues and too many endings. Also my book did not have a printed map in it, which is kind of bizarre for a book that is set in a real place, describes that place in great detail, and for which DETAILED MAPS ALREADY EXIST.

An aside on the subject of improbable rescues: The original Pixar team that worked on Toy Story had a rule that you could use a coincidence to get you into trouble, but you could not use a coincidence to get you out of trouble. It's lazy writing and lazy storytelling. Guess how many coincidences get the main character of Metro 2033 out of trouble? A lot! I counted three pivotal plot points that were 'solved' by coincidence. That is lame and bad. Every time the guy was about to die I knew some bullshit would happen to get him out of it. Borrrrriiinnnnng. The main character didn't solve anything. He just got lucky and failed forward. Great job, loser.

The only interesting part about the story was the fully realized world in which it occurs. The monsters are terrifying, the environment is terrifying, and the whole world is dark and brutal and miserable. That part is great. The characters? Flat and one dimensional. The dialog? A bad english translation of what was probably crap to begin with. The story? Weak.

Hopefully they will make a movie and tighten it up. I heard the video game is also good, and after seeing how well the world is described I can imagine the game being a lot of fun.

Nature is the Best: Birds of Paradise (the birds not the plants)

It's important to get the crib looking good if you're going to have company. And to put your best foot forward. If you're not sure what to wear then trust that black looks good on almost everything.

Trump's Wall is Bad and Dumb

There is no 'crisis' at the southern border. Trump's wall the worst kind of government spending: a solution that does not work for a problem that does not exist.

Beefing up the department that handles asylum seekers on Southern points of entry would solve the caravan problem. He could do that relatively easily, as outlined here in the Atlantic.

Income inequality is the biggest threat to America right now, right up there with global warming and worldwide pollution. Immigration is an issue, and it can be easily resolved using existing mechanisms or new policy. Building a wall won't do a damn thing.

That's all you need to know about it. If you want bullshit from bad politicians then review comments from Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Shumer. If you want facts, read a decent newspaper. Subscriptions to the New York Times start at $1 a week.

Welcome to 2019: Make Some Connections

Hello friends! I hope that you had a good Winter Holiday (winter holiday?) and New Year. If you didn't get a holiday or do anything for New Years Day then, umm, that sucks. Hopefully it was not something that will carry through the rest of the year.

I read the book Lost Connections and liked it. I recommend that you read it too if you wonder why depression is so common in societies that, for all intents and purposes, seem to have everything they could want. If you prefer to listen then get the audio version, or listen to the podcast with Sam Harris.

2018 ended on some welcome news for me: I got a job. I had been unemployed for a short while and it sucked. Partly because worrying about health insurance was a stress, and partly because I am much better when I am busy. The long unproductive time before I got laid off sort of but not really prepared me, so I was looking for work very aggressively before I got let go. It feels good to be back working again, and being able to work with smart people on fun opportunities is an exciting prospect. I will not post too much here as I prefer to keep this space separate from my business life (I have a customer-facing technical sales job and the views expressed here are not always popular).

Did some traveling at the end of the year. More on that later.

Happy New Year

More on the new year later, but for now I bring you this video.
Thanks, Internet.

Some People See a Christmas Miracle

I see people whose expensive medical services my tax dollars will now pay for.
Welcome to California!

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/dec/22/migrant-caravan-families-asylum-honduras-california

This is the Good Shit: Sewa vs. Luan

This is one of the all-time best games of skate. Believe it.

Cloud Containers and 'Pets vs. Cattle': Stop Already

Let's get this out of the way up front: I eat meat every day (though not much beef), without exception. I have done so for years, and will continue to do so. I also try to be honest and informed about the consequences of that choice. This post is about the consequences of language, and how smart people can also be very dumb.

I have had to give more than a few presentations over the past couple years (and sat through many, many more) where the advantage of cloud containers was explained in detail. When I sat through them the analogy of 'pets vs. cattle' was used almost every time. It's a popular analogy, and there are even lengthy blog posts codifying what exactly is meant by 'pets' and 'cattle' in your network architecture, and Randy Bias, who asserts in his twitter bio that he is a 'disruptor', claims to have started the meme for cloud architectures. Weird flex, but okay.

Here's the thing: the analogy makes a lot of sense if you are a network architect that has never given much thought to why cattle are 'disposable', and if you are not much given to introspection on how they are disposed of. If you consider only a fairly narrow perspective then yeah, it's fine, works well. If you think only briefly about what you mean when you use the word 'disposable', then the analogy is dumb as shit. You're talking about killing things, and only people that have never killed an animal and sociopaths talk about animals in that way.

Nowadays when I give the cloud presentations I use an heirloom china vs paper plate analogy instead, mainly so as not to have to suggest the idea that deleting a container instance is the same as killing an animal. People are emotionally attached to their heirloom china, care for it, look after it, and keep it for a long time. Paper plates are single use and truly disposable. Also they have much in common with a cloud server in that they are not a living thing that you have to kill, which, hey, that's nice. Tough luck for the trees, sure, but when you come up with a better analogy let me know and I will use that one instead.

It looks like you and I and everyone else that works in tech will continue to have to listen to this tired pets vs. cattle analogy for many years to come. Eventually Randy B. and his wack twitter account will disrupt off into the sunset / fade into obscurity, and the cloud will become so ubiquitous and widely understood that we will no longer have to explain it at all. That day cannot come soon enough. Until then: try heirloom china vs. paper plates. It's good. I promise.

Civics Lessons for Adults: The Fifth Risk by Michael Lewis

I have been getting caught up on my reading, most recently finishing The Fifth Risk by Michael Lewis. It is a very good and very timely summary of the work done (and not done) by the Trump transition team. The lesson is that the corruption and grift currently underway in Washington will have long-term damaging effects. 

You should care about this if you have kids, or if your friends have kids. Or not. It's hard to pay attention to this kind of thing when you are a busy person with things to do. I get it; youtube is not going to watch itself, after all. But if you can carve out the time, then it's a very good and easy read. I got through the book in two sittings, and you could probably do the same. 

The alternative is to just leave all this to someone else, and complain that 'they're all the same' and 'all politicians lie' and so forth and so on, but I have to tell you: it's not working out to your advantage. So pay attention to some small aspect of what is going on with your government, so that you can make an informed decision in 2020. 

The Whitest Playlist Ever Made

Omar, a true hero, put together this glorious 'Sunday music and hot coffee..' [sic] playlist for you, my dear listener. It's the iphone-commercial soundtrack aggregator you never knew you needed. Maybe very slightly dated now, but these are the hits, and as such have held up well. I wish homie would update it with some new cuts, but you can't have everything. If ever I need some generically pleasant and chill music to rock out to then this is what I reach for. You could do worse, is what I'm saying.

If you want to take advantage of more of Omar's strong work on the playlist front, then go to the playlist section of his soundcloud page. He's still hustling, posting a new list as recently as 6 days ago. I haven't had a chance to get into that one yet, but likely this week. I'm not busy, if you hadn't heard.

I hope the good and chill jams find you well.

It's the Little Things

I spend a lot of time alone, and as a solo middle-aged person the only kids I interact with are those of my friends. They are good kids, and sometimes they do things that warm my otherwise cold, dead heart. As when they make me a placeholder for Thanksgiving dinner. 

I made a pumpkin pie. They made me smile. I'll take that trade 100 times out of 100. 

T2: Trainspotting and Selective Memory

My love it kills me slowly,
Slowly I could die...

////
Caught up with the sequel to Trainspotting (officially: T2 Trainspotting) over the weekend. The movie will probably appeal to you if you saw and liked the original. If not, enh, it's probably fine as a standalone, but you might want to see the original first.

I loved the original, and watched it over and over again on my friend Esteeb's couch back in 1997. Partly because it was both hysterically funny and very grim, and that suits me right down to the ground. Also partly because I was pining over a girl who, in the parlance of the time, kicked me to the curb. That girl was fun while it lasted, but the fallout was severe. Back in those days I was not very well balanced at the best of times, so the breakup sent me into a tailspin, and I spent a few months drinking myself to sleep with 40s of Magnum and trainspotting on the TV. If Esteeb was bothered he never mentioned or showed it, and eventually I got my shit together. Mostly together, anyway. Ish. Together-ish.

The latest Trainspotting movie is very much an examination of what the four central characters have, or haven't, done with their lives in the past 20 years. So: if the original resonated with you at all, and if - just to choose an example at random - you are a middle-aged man that feels like reflecting on what became of his youth, his successes, and his failures, then the movie might speak to you in very interesting ways. Depends where it finds you, I guess.

The song above is an extended-ending remix of a Wolf Alice jam that appears at the end of the movie. The original is great, but the best part is the final chorus, so stretching that out gives it some extra. I loved it. YMMV. Download the MP3 here.

Bringing things up to the present day: Esteeb remains one of my closest friends, all these many years later. A couple months ago he asked me over lunch, 'hey, do you remember that girl with the reddish-blonde hair you dated in college?'

I said, 'the one that I was all bummed about for a while? The hot one?'

He said, 'yeah, that one - I see her at church sometimes.'

I laughed and said, 'Oh yeah?'

'Yeah, I see her, and all I can remember about her is that you shagged her.'

And thus sometimes friendship looks like ignoring my lame drama from back in the day, and focusing on the positive. Esteeb remains the best.
Thanks for reading.

Thanksgiving 2018

Desktop Wallpaper Courtesy PDW (link below)

It's been an interesting runup to Thanksgiving this year. I have not posted much because much of what I feel most strongly about is political, and you are probably more sick of interacting with politics than I am by now. I have finished several books in the past few months, and those are usually good for some blog content, but somehow between the time my ideas ferment in my tiny brain and I sit down to type up the words something gets lost: motivation, relevance, value, and much else. So here we are.

I lost my job a couple weeks ago. The layoff was not a surprise; my company got acquired and I started looking for a new job several months ago in advance of any bad news from my employer. My hope was to have a new job lined up and collect a severance, but it did not work out. Got an 8 week severance, which is better than nothing but still not great. The Feds tax lump-sum severance pay like a bonus, so they get around 45% of it. So I got about 4 weeks of pay, after taxes. Glad to get the money, but it's not much to live on. Fortunately I keep my fixed costs relatively low compared to my total income, so I am not in dire straits right now. Biggest cost after rent is health insurance, which is around $700 a month. (If I had a family or dependents it would be 3x that much.) So I can keep the lights on for a while while I look for a new gig. 

The hardest part was that I have not been unemployed for over 20 years, all the way back to when I was still in college. The absence of work and a related set schedule was very demotivating. Why do anything today when I can do it tomorrow? Why get something done in the morning when you can do it in the afternoon? Rinse, repeat. Instead of handling my business in a timely fashion I push it back, over and over again. Not my usual pattern, and not one that I want to continue. 

People have been telling me to 'enjoy my time off'. That's a nice idea, but it is very difficult to 'enjoy your time off' when you do not know how long it will be, and, most especially: I'M NOT EARNING ANY FUCKING MONEY. No idea why people think that is 'enjoyable', but I have heard it so many times that I now gently remind them, 'hey, you know I don't have a job, right? And I still have bills to pay?' No doubt there are people that are very comfortable with that state of affairs. I am not one of them. 

So! Thanksgiving. Being jobless frees me up to ride my bike, and to make treats. So I have been making cookies, and banana bread, and some pies. And riding the bike. Fun for me. I hope that your Thanksgiving is abundant in foods and good company. It gets no better. 

See you out there.


Prometheus Design Werx desktop wallpaper here. 

What are the best cycling bib shorts?

Just Two Men In Tights at Sunset

Updated 17 Nov 2018 to move the Rapha Pro Bib Shorts II to the bottom of the list. The leg grippers are defective, and after getting two new pairs of shorts from Rapha the gripper issue is worse, not better. Unacceptable in a short at any price point, but especially at $275 a pair.
*****

TLDR: it depends on your anatomy, physiology, saddle, and riding style. If you change saddles you may notice that some bibs do not work for you, so once you find a combination that works, stick with it, and change with caution.
I liked Rapha Pro and Eliel Laguna Seca or Hollywood shorts (the chamois is the same in the Eliel shorts, so either one is good).

//
I tested a bunch of different bib shorts over the past year in an effort to find something that I liked. Price is a factor because they can get expensive; I got all of mine at some type of discount, either on sale or through a contact at Competitive Cyclist, so you can do the same. I put at least 10 hours in the saddle on each set of shorts, with a two hour minimum for each test ride (after initial break in rides of about an hour). I tried two different saddles (more on that shortly), across several months and these are the bib shorts and saddle combinations that worked for me.

A few words on fit: I am barely six feet tall, with a 32" inseam and a long torso. I have a 34" waist, and wear a 42" regular suit coat. I weigh about 190 lbs, and I am built like a sprinter, not a GC rider. Most of my riding is leaned forward, with my wrists and forearms on the bars, or on the drops. So I roll my hips forward to flatten out my spine and reduce flexion. I used a Specialized Phenom saddle for several months before switching to a Specialized Power saddle (143 mm width).

Tested, in descending order of preference:

1.  Eliel Hollywood Bib Shorts in size L - Excellent shorts, and no issues with either saddle in any riding position. All day comfortable. These are their priciest model, but you can get the same chamois and build quality in their Laguna Seca short. Made right here in California, which is important considering how hard it is to run a small manufacturing business in this state.

2. Specialized RBX Pro in size L - Good shorts, suited for long days in the saddle. The best thing about these shorts is that you can often find them on sale for $125 or less, which is a good price for a premium bib. They are extremely plush, and aimed squarely at maximum comfort. I rated them higher than the Giordana shorts because they fit me better and are easy to find for half as much money.

3. Giordana Lungo Bib Shorts in size L - Good shorts, but not well suited to my body / saddle. They are beautifully made in Italy, with a light, technical fabric and a seamless chamois and only one seam on the legs. You can tell they were designed and assembled with some considerable care, as they hardly weigh anything and it's very hard to make a garment in this way. They feel fine when you first get them on, but I did not get along with them very well with the Phenom saddle. After switching to the Power saddle things improved, but they are still not a great fit for me and I cannot wear them comfortably on a ride longer than an hour. I keep them in the rotation because it's too late to return them, but I would not buy them again. It's a shame, because the fit and finish of the shorts is top notch, and the shorts are superb aside from fitment.

4. Assos T.tiburu_s7 Bib Shorts - These are their cold-weather bibs, and I am not very impressed by them. Build quality is fine, but the chamois does not agree with me at all. Also the front of the short stops well below my belly button, which seems very odd when compared with other insulated bibs I own from Rapha. Moreover the insulation is weak as hell, and they do not actually keep you very warm. Reviewers on Comp Cyclist say they are 'fantastic' and 'extremely warm', but I am here to tell you they are 'not worth it' and 'not for you if you like the way a Rapha Pro Team chamois fits'. Some riders like them a lot, but my experience is that there are better options elsewhere. YMMV

5. Rapha Pro Team Bib Shorts II in size XL- Good shorts until the elastic fails, which happened even before I wore the most recent set on an actual ride. Comfortable, good chamois suitable for most types of riding. The elastic at the very bottom of the leg does not grip as well as it should at the very edge of the cuff. This has happened on both of the Rapha Pro Team bibs that I own, and I think in their next iteration the leg opening will be smaller to correct this issue. $270 a pair it should not happen. It's beyond a cosmetic issue - it flaps in the wind. For reference my legs are 47 cm around where the bibs should sit.

That's my experience. Hope it was helpful.
See you out there. 

Michelle Obama

It's been a few years so it's hard to remember what it was like in the time before the current mentally defective president was elected, and we didn't have a caricature of Disney cartoon villains living in the White House.

Let this article remind you of what it was like to have two intelligent, thoughtful, strong people working together in the White House: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/ng-interactive/2018/nov/17/michelle-obama-interviewed-miley-cyrus-katy-perry-becoming

The gulf in intellect, manners, class, and ability between the Obamas and the current clowns is so wide you could fit the Milky Way inside it. Also, not for nothing, but Trump is the one who was gifted 400 million dollars from his father. The Obamas come from working-class backgrounds. Money can buy you the presidency, but it cannot buy competence.

Congratulations to the American voter. Again.

Addiction, Again

I have been thinking about this a lot lately. For friends and family that stop by this space - I am not addicted to harmful drugs (my only vices are exercise and sugar), but I do exhibit addictive behaviors if, for example, I am prevented from going to the gym. Understanding why this happens is useful.