Unhhhhh

MMMMM

Oh yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

Weeks and Weeks Go By with No Word

Foggy

Hi peeps! I have not posted to the blogspace because I do not have anything much to share. I, umm, ride my bike? I got to go to San Francisco and hang out with Ze Newbs. That was fun. We went to dinner and one of the courses included this treat with 'San Francisco fog'. Dry ice effects never get old, so we got a big kick out of that. Me and Ze Newbs went to Barcelona to have dinner several years ago, and we had some laughs about that adventure while we caught up over another tasty feast.

Work is a frustration right now so I am looking for a new job. I don't have the skills I need for the job I want so it's time to hit the (digital) books. It would have been smarter to do this a year ago but I was too busy doing dumb shit. (Not strictly true - I was thisclose to getting a new job in December but lost out at the very end to someone with more experience, so it's not like I have been completely useless.)

I was telling Sweet Katie that my sales territories got shifted around so I will not have much cause to travel to the Bay Area on the company dime. I will have to do it on my own, which I will be doing in the Fall. I will provide plenty of advanced notice so that Big Cheese can enjoy me riding my new StumpJumper around in his yard. It's gonna be great. I will be looking at a Caletti gravel bike with 650b wheels in between berms, jumps, ruts and hot laps on Big Cheese lawn(s) and other riding activities while in the region. This stuff is what gets me out of bed in the morning. It's not much, but it is enough.

Hey Did Specialized Launch a New Mountain Bike Yesterday?

What was the bike called again?

They did? Weird, I hadn't heard. Was there press? Not sure. Let's check BikeRadar and see if they had any coverage.

Yeah they mentioned it. And then they mentioned it again. And again. And again.

Note that this screencap omits the shoutout to the promo video earlier on the page, so this isn't even all of it. You're welcome.

Never Mind Ronde van Vlandaaren, what about Paris-Roubaix?

Sagan Winning Paris-Roubaix 2018

Ronde van Vlandaaren 2018 was a good and exciting race, and if you watch any of the video then you will very likely get a feel for why it is such an event. All of Belgium closes down for the day and they throw a big party. It's pretty great!

It was not great for your girl's favorite cyclist, Peter Sagan. He finished sixth? Ninth? :: checks internet :: He finished sixth. The winner was N8ki Terpstra, who used excellent teamwork and strong legs to power himself to glorious victory. Well done Niki.

But that's not why we're here! We are here to talk about the result of the 2018 Paris-Roubaix, which was won by Peter Sagan! He was quite thrilled with the result. If you are wondering what it feels like to just finish the race, here is an interview with Taylor Phinney, who managed to ride into the top 10. Phinney is a good and chill guy in his interviews, and his responses to these questions are excellent.

More Words About Cycling: Milano-San Remo, Gent-Wevelgem, and Ronde van Vlandaaren

De Ronde van Vlandaaren kicks starts at 12:30 AM Pacific Daylight Time on 1 April, so by the time you catch up with this it will likely be over. That's a shame, because it is almost always a great race, and for the Belgians it is the biggest race of the year.

Since we last visited the Milano-San Remo race finished with Vincenzo Nibali winning by breaking away from the leading group on the Poggio. I had said that the classics races are rarely won by GC riders, but Nibali has won all three of the Grand Tour races, so he is very much a GC rider. He is also a beast that managed to ride away from the best cyclists in the world in one of the hardest races on the calendar, so all credit to him.

How did Nibali win? He won in part because he is awesome, and also in part because the rest of the riders were squabbling amongst themselves about who would lead the chase after he broke away. This happens often, because riders know that they are not strong enough to participate in a chase because they will get outsprinted at the line by someone like Peter Sagan.

Sagan pointed out after the race that no riders were willing to work with him at Milano-San Remo, and he congratulated Nibali for having the balls to take it.

The video above shows the finish of Gent-Wevelgem, and it shows what happens if you leave your sprint too late. You can see the riders waiting for Sagan to take off, because they know if they go first then he will immediately get on their wheel and likely beat them to the line. The alternative is to wait for Sagan to start the sprint, and hope that you have the legs to keep up. Good luck with that. 

So Many Words About Cycling

*swoon*

I am here to try and get you pumped about men’s bicycle racing. Not just any men’s bicycle racing, but the best kind of bicycle racing: the Monuments. 

This is likely an uphill battle (HONK), but no matter. It is worth the effort, because cycling, in almost all of its many forms, is fun as hell. And unlike most of the “major” sports you can actually get out there and Do It your whole athletic life. (Yeah you can get out there and get some burn on the court at the local Y in middle age but your knees and back are a wear item, so maybe give them a rest?) 

Do not be put off by the endless in-group bullshit you may have heard from pretentious douchebags the world over. Cycling is here to dish up some good ass excitement in the coming weeks, and you should get involved.

World Tour Racing

The World Tour cycling season is comprised of many different categories and types of races. The Grand Tours, which you have mostly likely heard of, are the Giro d’Italia, Tour de France, and the Vuelta a España. The Grand Tour races are a massive undertaking: multi-week stage races that span thousands of kilometers and even continents (the TdF often starts in countries other than France, because, you know, money). These races cost tens of millions of dollars (or euros) to put on, and the stages include team time trials, individual time trials, rolling courses and mountain courses and they really do just go on and on. They are so long that it is common for riders to agree in advance of one or several of the stages of a GT race to take it easy, because it sucks to go flat out all day long in a headwind while cowshit blows into your mouth and eyes. Stage races can be thrilling, or they can be boring, strategic affairs with all the drama sucked out of them by teams with enormous budgets and outrageously strong riders (Team USPS last decade; Team Sky this decade). If you want to get excited about bike racing, then GT races are not a great introduction. They are too long, and it is confusing for casual fans when a guy that wins a dramatic sprint on stage 8 does not actually win, or even come close to taking the lead in, the big race (aka the ‘general classification’). Grand Tours are won by a very specific type of rider, about which more anon. 

We are not here to talk about the Grand Tours. We are here because the best and most exciting types of bike races are the Classics, and the best of these is the Monuments. Fun fact: You win an actual cobblestone monument if you win Paris-Roubaix, and the trophy is unique, if also ugly. Another fun fact: the youngest Monument was first raced in 1913(!!). 

The Classics are grueling one-day races over varied terrain (cobblestones, gravel, whatever passes for a paved road surface in Italy, etc.) in often brutal conditions. Since they are only one day the results tend to be much more varied than in the Grand Tours. It is much harder to spend your way to success in the Classics, because you cannot just buy every single good rider and wear down the field (although Team Sky is trying). Nor can you stack up your small advantages over the course of a four week odyssey (again: Team Sky with their ‘marginal gains’ :: barfs :: ). You have to be both very good and a bit lucky to win a Classic, as it takes an enormous amount of talent to even be in contention at the end of a race. Sometimes you can be a race favorite and get wrecked by a jacket thrown over barrier. 

The Classics tend to also be won by a very specific type of rider, although there are a few modern riders that will try and compete for victories in both Grand Tours and the Classics.

They run throughout the year, and the Monuments all run in the Spring (Milano-San Remo, Ronde van Vlaanderen, Paris-Roubaix, Liege-Baston-Liege) except for Il Lombardia, which is run in October. 

You may see these races described in English as the Tour of Flanders (Ronde van Vlaanderen) or the Tour of Lombardy (Il Lombardia). Keeping all the different names in order is hard enough, so you are duly forgiven if you prefer the English titles. Nod-snobbing fans will maybe correct you, or maybe they will just be glad that someone besides them gives a shit about cycling for once. 

There are other one-off road races that are just as prestigious as the Monuments, most notably the World Championships, which bestows the honor of wearing the famous (in cycling circles) rainbow jersey for the entire next year. Any previous road race world champion can wear the rainbow stripes on their sleeves during a road race, which is fun and cool and insider-y. The various national championships for each country are governed by similar jersey rules, so you will see the road race champion for Germany wearing his custom team jersey with special German colors in the World Tour peloton, and so on for the Dutch, French, Belgians, etc. It’s pretty great! Winning the national championships is a big deal, so I enjoy when the riders represent the colors. 

Note that a world champion is also awarded for the individual time trial, but the ITT world championship jersey (and previous winners sleeve stripes) is only to be worn during time trial events. Thus the road race rainbow stripes are among the most coveted jerseys in all of cycling. 

So! The Classics are happening, and the Monuments are happening, and it is going to be great. But who are you watching?

The Teams

There are 18 World Tour teams, all of whom carry 25 riders on their roster. As in all other forms of racing, money is an issue. Some teams have a lot of it, and some are shaking out the couch cushions. The big money really stopped rolling in after the doping scandals of the late aughts, so many teams really are scraping by. Also, since the big money left it opened the door to sponsors that are, shall we say, niche. Sponsors range from flooring companies, oven hood manufacturers, coffee companies, governments (see below), lottery businesses, and much else. 

Cycling has always been the metier of rich white men, but in recent years the circle has expanded to include rich men from such forward-thinking eastern nations as Kazakhstan (Team Astana), Russia (Team Katusha-Alpecin), Team UAE (UAE, natch) and Bahrain (Bahrain Merida). The riders are just trying to earn a living, but it is kind of hard to get behind a team whose budget is provided by murderous dictators and/or serial abusers of human rights. YMMV 

Most of the team sponsors, major or otherwise, have the greasy feel of rich white guys that want to leg hump the pros at races, group rides and social events. In my limited conversations with former pros this seems to very much be the case. 

The most heavily funded team has sucked the life out of the last several Tours de France by putting together an all star team of riders and adding money and science and more money and drugs until they are very difficult to beat. They also sucked the life out of the 2017 Vuelta. And yet! They did not win the Giro last year (shoutout to Tom Dumoulin), so it is possible for other GC riders to step up.

A change for this year is that the teams are only allowed 7 riders per race (down from 8 last year), in the hopes that it will shake up some of the results, especially in the GT races.

The Riders

When you picture a typical road cyclist you probably imagine someone like Chris Froome, or, if you haven’t paid attention since an American was winning races, Lance Armstrong. An emaciated, hollow-cheeked guy in a yellow jersey, because the Tour de France is the only time anyone pays attention. Both of these GC riders are well suited to winning GC races: pencil-necked and toothpick-armed, likely unable to do even a single push-up, strong climbers, excellent in the time trials, and surrounded by a team of elite support riders, some of whom could probably win a Grand Tour of their own were they given the same support. They are phenomenal athletes, capable of outrageous scores in things like VO2 max and power to weight ratio. They are also boring as hell and get smoked in the Classics.*

* Armstrong was an excellent Classics rider before he got the cancer and the drugs and the plan and reinvented himself into a superlative GC rider. He was still decent in the Classics, but it was no longer a priority for him once he transformed himself. 

Most of the Classics eat the GC riders alive. They are too long, without enough climbing. Instead you need a rider that can do something besides get an escort to the base of the mountain and then do his own work. You need a well-rounded cyclist that can climb a short distance, very fast, and then recover, and then do it again. These are the most interesting riders in cycling, because they can do almost everything well, and do a few things extremely well indeed. Also, they look like actual people, and not like they would be trapped indefinitely when their significant other falls asleep on them. 

Look to riders like Peter Sagan (pictured above) to make some noise in the Classics. The Slovak is the reigning road race world champion (three times in a row!) and is a threat to win a one day road race every time he throws a leg over the bike. Sagan is by far the most popular cyclist in the world right now. This is partly down to the fact that he rides with panache, and partly because he looks like an actual person and not a stick figure with weird balloon legs. Also he says the right things, as here after a second place finish:

“Sometimes I can do some things, sometimes I can’t. Today, I had bad luck but also good luck at the same time. It would’ve been better first place, but I don’t have to have everything,” Sagan said after showering and before signing autographs and posing for selfies with the huge crowd that was waiting at the Bora-Hansgrohe bus.

Sagan frequently does wheelies and bike tricks, makes cycling look fun. Not afraid to flex on other riders, or to display insane bike handling skills, as at the close of a recent stage of the Tirreno-Adriatico. Notice how he makes a split second decision to hop a curb and shortcut a roundabout here to save some time. That is some very casual, next-level shit. 

Not for nothing, but he is also quite handsome. I have described him to others as ‘the guy your girlfriend hooked up with during the Eastern part of her European tour, but don’t worry he was totally chill about it’. 

Other contenders for the classics, especially the upcoming Milano-San Remo: Greg van Avermaet - like Sagan, a superbly talented all around rider. Not as powerful on the bike as Sagan (few are), but the course favors him this year. 

Michal Kwiatkowski - Probably the most talented classics rider in the field after Sagan. Famously beat Sagan in last year’s Milano-San Remo, although people will remember Sagans attack on the Poggio (a famous climbing section) longer than they will remember the winner. Losing with style is sometimes more impressive than winning. 

Tiejs Benoot - Young rider that is in excellent form right now. Won Strade-Bianche this year in decisive, thrilling fashion. Turned in some strong results at Tirreno-Adriatico.

The Classics are extremely difficult to predict, so although it is generally acknowledged that a handful of riders are the class of the field they do not always win.

Strategy

Typical race strategy for the Classics races is to identify a specific rider that you want to protect for the race, ride for him, and then cut him loose when he feels like he can get the win. Your ability to deliver your rider to the line is affected by your own team, mechanical failures, rider failures, and the other teams, who often have conflicting strategies (such as to ride off the front in a small group). It is almost impossible to solo to victory in a bike race so the teams often work with one another until they don’t. If you like game theory you will love cycling race strategy.

When is the Next Monument?

The next several weeks will have some of the best racing of the year. The first (and best) Classic that isn’t an official monument is Strade Bianche. It runs in a big loop around Siena, and it makes liberal use of the white gravel roads for which that region is justifiably famous. This year’s race was run in a driving storm and it was fantastic. The calendar looks like this: 

Milano-San Remo is 17 March, so maybe catch some race replays in between watching free labor generate revenue in the NBAs minor leagues. 

Ronde van Vlaanderen is 1 April

Paris-Roubaix is 8 April

Liege-Baston-Liege is 22 April

How Do I Watch?

Depends where you live. The races are easy to find on TV in Europe, but it’s tougher in the states. Cycling Fans dot com has a good summary of where to find coverage in your local area.

The Elephant in the Room

Drugs! So many goddamn drugs. Cycling is cleaner than it used to be, but there are still drugs everywhere. Not as much EPO, but it is awash in painkillers, stimulants, respiratory medications, diet medication, and whatever else they can get away with. Something something cheating trying something, but if you are strongly anti-drugs then you should probably just not watch any sports, ever. The cycling community tends to be split on the drug users. Some are ostracized, some are lionized, and some end up making a lot of money after they did the drugs and everyone is cool with it. 

It does not help that the most successful drug user, and greatest ever Tour de France rider, is also one of the all-time biggest assholes in professional cycling, or any sport. So fuck that guy. 

It’s also probably not a good idea to get popped for drugs when you have a very prominent marketing campaign and ‘zero tolerance’ policy.

Enjoy the Races!

Seriously, they are great.

Mileage

Since we last visited I have been to Oakland / San Francisco / Oakland / San Diego and then home. That trip was not bad! Before that I had to go to Orlando for less than 24 hours. That trip was miserable! So the travel up and down the CA coast was a relative breeze. Disneyworld is weird. People are gross fake nice because of the focus on 'customer experience' and it is carved out of a swamp. Florida has some lovely places to visit but Orlando is not one of them.

Lots more to share on topics big and small, but I'll get to those later. First things first: what about some jams? Try this one. It's a lot different from the usual around here. It's good and chill. Most of the music I rep here is good but not very chill.

Old(er)

Hard Eight

Not sure how we got here, but here we are.

Could be worse. There's cake, so that's something.

Hot Slow Jam: Worlds Away by 3LAU feat Emma Hewitt

Presidents Day is somehow not a holiday that everyone observes. Come on, people. If you can't get on board with GWash because he was a slaveowning oligarch shitheel (which: yeah, that's legitimate) you should absolutely celebrate the birth of Honest Abe, who was righteous and great.

Turn up this good and chill jam and pour a little out for a true American hero. Shoutout to the first (and last) great Republican president: Abraham Lincoln.

Serious question: Why don't more parents name their kid Lincoln? It's such a good name.

Hopefully you enjoyed your day today, even if you had to work. See you out there.

Movie Stars in History

An old photograph of Brian Cranston, taken for a role as a gold miner for a period piece set during Gold Rush era California.

Nice

This is a good cycling photo. It's a picture of Ellen Noble, who is rad, bunnyhopping a barrier during a cyclocross race, which is also rad. This is a very difficult thing to do! Most men (who ride the same courses, with the same barriers) opt not to do it, and there are only two women that I know of that have done it (the other is Pauline Ferrand-Prevot, who is a boss and rides a bike even better than she photographs, which is saying something: women's world road race champion 2014,  women's cyclocross world champion 2015, plus way too many other victories to even begin to list here).

So! Shoutout to Ellen Noble for being awesome, and to Rapha for posting the picture, and also sponsoring Noble. She is awesome.

80's Budget Bianchi Bit Busted But Born Better

Not much I want to blog about lately. Fixed up my friends old bike so he could ride it and/or use it on an indoor trainer. Did that for his birthday as part of his birthday present. Probably you are super interested in reading about that? I thought not. It wasn't much of a project, as the bike itself was not great when it was new, and as my man dumbomollusk reminded me: you can't polish a turd. Even so, I polished that thing up as much as I could. It turned out pretty good.

I put new tubes and tires on it, fixed the handlebar tape, which I think was original vintage circa 80's. Lubed the chain, which should really be replaced, but there's a limit to how much I want to invest in this bucket. And I deleted the awful reflectors, which were hideous and useless.

The updated handlebar wrap will not be confused with anything from your local bike shop but it's not bad for a first effort, and it is perfectly adequate given our source material. You can actually ride it now, which is something. And if you did ride it somewhere people would not look at you funny. They would think you were a dedicated hipster riding a retro bike. Except for the saddle, but that was another piece that was a step too far for this effort. If my buddy wants to replace it then he will do so.

Me At Every Party Ever

I don't get out much in my advanced age, but this song describes a very familiar feeling, and it makes it sound very catchy.

No Need to Argue and Dolores O'Riordan

News out today that Dolores O'Riordan has died.

I have not listened to a Cranberries song in a while, so it was time to dive into the back catalog. Of course I bought the records in the mid-90's; EVERYONE bought the records in the mid-90's, and that was a time when people were still buying records for real. Those copies are long gone but the internet provides.

Linger was their first hit, but Dreams was very much My Jam, and I absolutely wore it out back in 1993, so I was well-primed for their follow-up record in 1994. Zombie ended up being the song that charted the best on that record, and it's a great song, but if you're dealing with some kind of overly dramatic love-of-your-life relationship breakup drama in 1994 (or ever) then look no further than the underrated No Need to Argue.

We could dive into the mechanics of this song, and explore its' clever combination of simplicity and sophistication, but let's not. O'Riordan had a beautiful voice, and this song is beautifully sung. It either speaks to you, or it does not. It speaks to me in a different way than it once did, because it's been a long time, but the sound has held up well. I expect it will continue to do so, and that sad-hearted kids will be listening to it for many years to come.

Dolores O'Riordan was 46.

Happy Fuckin' New Year!

Hot damn! The year of our lord two thousand and eighteen. Twenty-fucking-eighTEEN!!! Are you ready for this shit? I SAID ARE YOU READY?? I am so ready. Just, so goddamn ready. What are we gonna fuckin' do this year? Oh you have no idea. NO IDEA! So here's some things that we are gonna fuckin' do:

• Hit the gym, because that gets me out of the house, which is Good and Healthy. (Sleeves optional, obvs.)
• Shock the fuckin' pipes (see previous bullet point) 
• Work at the place where I work, up to and including maybe getting a new job, at which point I will work there like its my fuckin' job. It's not easy being a goddamn genius at work every day but somehow I manage. 
• Ride the fuckin' bike farther and faster than ever before, though not at the same time. (Actually kind of looking forward to this one.) May make a pilgrimage to Santa Barbara and do some fuckin' riding up there. May ride from LA to SB and take the train back. May also ride down to Solana Beach and take the train back. Maybe both? We will see. 
• Read the pile of books in my bedroom currently doing double duty as a nightstand
• Fuckin go somewhere. Not sure where yet! Mexico City was awesome so maybe go back there and do different stuff. Maybe somewhere further afield. 
• Be fuckin' social

Tried to get started on this last one already by creating an account in one of the free-to-browse online dating app services. It fuckin' sucked. Out of the 300 or so people I found in my search and that I can message "right now" mayyyyybe five in my age range are appealing? Thousands of guys on the site in my area are looking at that and seeing the same thing. Sooooo... yeah. It's a tough market. 

Let's fuckin' do this. 

Year in Review: At Least There Were Cookies

This calendar year marked a new low in the total number of posts in this space. There was not much that I felt like writing about when I had time. Politics is fatiguing, and the fact that the United States used the electoral college - a system originally put in place to appease slaveowners - to elect an angry, demented pissbaby is something that will cause harm for years if not decades. Great job, America! The founding fathers really paid it forward. It as if appeasing slaveowners was maybe not a good idea. Go figure.

There is an uncomfortably high likelihood that the most powerful pissbaby in history will lead us to nuclear war, killing tens of millions of people, throwing the economy into a tailspin, and making the Korean peninsula completely uninhabitable. The GOP could do the right thing and remove him from office, but as long as he keeps giving rich people tax cuts and promoting income inequality that seems unlikely.

Two hurricanes blew through the USVI and somehow my uncle's house survived intact. He was lucky, but the experience was so harrowing that he still has nightmares about it, three months on. It turns out that sitting in a house lit by flashlights while the wind outside is blowing sustained winds over 170 MPH for hours on end will leave a scar. St. Thomas and St. John are trashed (literally) and will take years to fully recover.

Hurricane Harvey caused similar levels of damage in Houston by dumping enough rain to cover the entire continental United States under four centimeters of water. That's a lot of water! Houston metro is over 600 square miles of ugly urban sprawl, and the massive flooding did it no favors.

Does the fact that I got a new bike count as good news? I guess it counts as good news for me. There were other ups and downs this year but they do not make for very interesting reading.

See you in 2018. 

Not the Definition of Insanity: "Doing the Same Thing Over and Over Again and Expecting a Different Result"

I am worn out with the bullshit, inaccurate statement that "doing the same thing over and over again is the definition of insanity." Fuck no it is not! There is a whole book about the definition(s) of insanity, and you can buy a copy.

Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is the definition of STUPIDITY.

Don't be stupid.

Race Reporter Ruby Rides a Bike

Just in time for the holidays, here is Specialized with some superb marketing sweet cuteness. This makes me want to go ride a bike. And also buy one for my niece, if she were at all interested in riding bicycles (she is not). I can't ride right now and it suuuuucks. So watching cycling videos and getting super pumped about getting back on the bike will have to do.

Speaking of being super pumped about getting on the bike: this video is good because Ruby makes bike riding seem like a hell of a lot of fun. People have a tendency to take it very seriously, and wear terribly ugly outfits, etc. They don't always seem like they are having fun. Weird, but here we are.

Ruby's bike has a custom front crank (it's a 1x, i.e. it only has a single chainring up front), Dura Ace brake controls / shifters, an ultegra rear derailleur, and probably some other bits that I cannot figure out. It's a lot different from the stock bike, but whatever. My only quibble with the video is that she says that her power 'comes from her bike'. That is wrong. Her power comes from her, and that is awesome.

Bicycling: Peter Sagan and Race Reporter Ruby

Peter Sagan, aka the guy that your ex hooked up with during her backbacking tour of Slovakia a couple years ago but don't worry he was totally chill about it, is the most popular cyclist in the world right now. He often rides the Tour of California as a leisurely warm-up for the Tour de France. Most professional riders are riding the Giro d'Italia in May, but that race is a brutal slog (like the Tour), and riding the two efforts back to back is not common for riders that want to win the GC of the Tour. (Chris Froome, who is a great rider but the type of guy that your ex felt very comfortable rooming with during her backpacking tour of Slovakia because they were such 'great friends', made big news when he announced that he was riding the Giro this year. Chris Froome is good at a very specific type of cycling, and he is boring as hell.)

In 2016 Sagan won the Ronde van Vlaanderen (Tour of Flanders). In his words after the race, "no one wants to work with me, so I just have to do it by myself." Which is true, but almost impossible to actually do. (Sagan was leading the 2017 Ronde van Vlaanderen when he crashed because a jacket hung over a barrier caught his handlebars.)

As part of Sagan's effort at the ToC last year he sat down with Race Reporter Ruby, who is the best. Please enjoy this interview between two stars. Race Reporter Ruby did more very good interviews with other riders, so if you liked her interview style I encourage you to review those as well, if only to hear how she pronounces "South Lake Tahoe", which is adorable.

The Wayback Machine: Counting Crows and Middle Age

I had a chance to see Counting Crows recently. Free tickets, free beers, super good seats. I opted not to attend. Skipped it because they have a tendency to get all jam-band-y in their live shows, which is definitely not my jam. (HONK) And also because the songs on August and Everything After mean a lot to me; I was afraid that hearing them again a lifetime later in a different context would have made me feel some feels, which is blah. I was also afraid I would feel nothing at all, which is worse.

When I first got a copy of the record on which this song appears I wore it out. If it were an actual record I would have had to buy a new copy because the needle would have smoothed the groove. As it is I just wore out everyone else's patience while I load-tested the speakers and repeat-offender'd my preferred cuts. Rain King remains my gold-standard, all-time favorite from this record. YMMV.

Covered this already in another post just over two years ago, so I will not belabor the unhappy sections. I will say that this song reminds me of spending time with Big Cheese and Sweet Katie when we were young. It's all a bit of a blur - it was a long time ago, and I spent entirely too much time drinking as much as I could afford, as often as I could afford it. The mere fact of my survival during that era is partly dumb luck, and partly my patient and generous friends.

As for generous friends, were we ever that young? I guess so, because there are pictures. I remember Sweet Katie was the best kind of beautiful (she still is). I remember laughing a lot. Big Cheese was funny (he still is), and he and I had a good time together, celebrating our infrequent successes and laughing about our many, many fuck ups.

It's been decades, but the Counting Crows remind me of the pure truth of Big Cheese and Sweet Katie's tremendous kindness towards me; it is a through-line that spans my entire adult lived experience. The other through-line, closely related to the first, is how much I love them. The only way I would see the Counting Crows at this point is if they were playing a live show at my cousins house and all of us were going together. In December. In 1993.

Also, not for nothing, but: this song fucking rules. Merry Christmas.

Happy(?) Thanksgiving

I hope that you are having a good thanksgiving. If it is not good then I hope it is over soon, and that there is pie. If it is not good and there is no pie (which is very bad indeed), then make yourself a goddamn pie next time. It is not hard to do, and everything is a little bit better (or less bad) if you have some delicious pie.

I made four pies (so far) this year. Ate half of one, gave the rest away. Pumpkin pies are easy to make two at a time because the recipe can be doubled without affecting the result.

This particular pie is a variation of the classic pumpkin, with an amaretti cookie crust. It is very tasty and pretty easy, so if you want I will send you the recipe. The hardest part is forming the crust in the pan with your hands. I looked at a couple videos on how to make a graham cracker crust and they were useless garbage, so your best bet is to get in there with your hands and go for it. A bit of trial and error will see you through. Aim for an even layer of crust everywhere, and pay special attention to the angle of where the bottom of the pan meets the side of the pan - always a lot of buildup there.

Big plan for thanksgiving over here is doing homework. I cannot make any more pies because I loaned out all my pie tins. Fuck.

I went there: Boulder, CO

Boulder was nice. The trip itself was a drag, because the training was not very helpful. But the town is lovely, and it snowed while I was there. I very much enjoyed the snow, although the locals were not pumped. I got to leave for more temperate climes at the end of the week (87 and sunny here today).

Got myself a souvenir jersey from one of the local bike shops. Not the famously pretentious snobs at Vechhios, because f those guys. I got it at the Rapha store, which is a coffee shop that also sells flattering cycling gear.

The people I spoke to at the Rapha store were very chill, and we talked a lot about how the old-school model of the "Local Bike Shop" is not sustainable, because it does not take long for people to run out of stuff to buy. Yeah sure you need n+1 bikes, but even then you cannot buy a new bike very often (and if you can, most people do not). So how do you drive foot traffic and keep the lights on?

You used to be able to do that with Service and Parts departments, but Amazon has killed the latter, and general commitment to DIY (and instructions for everything on the intertubez) has put a huge dent in the former. Which is why most new bike shops now prominently feature a coffee bar, and also probably a bar bar. This gives cyclists (or coffee drinkers, or beer drinkers) a reason to come to the shop, hang out, talk to people. Rapha sells yearly memberships that offer unlimited free coffee drinks at all their shops. The (very nice) guy working the shop told me that they have people that sign up for the club just for the coffee deal; they don't even ride. Your local bike shop wants to be your local hangout, and that is smart business.

I Went There: Ciudad Mexico

Yeah I Was That Guy

I went to Mexico City (Ciudad Mexico, or CDMX) with some friends. It was pretty good! I took a bunch of pictures, a very small portion of which I will share here as I sort through them.

This is me on the Pyramid of the Sun in Teotihuacan, just hanging out, as you do. That's the Pyramid of the Moon in the background.

Mexico City was a fantastic time. Super good food, excellent sightseeing, easy to get around, and lots to do. Many neighborhoods are walkable (depending on where you stay). We were in Roma Norte by Fuente de la Cibeles, which is in the city center, right in the middle of several very nice neighborhoods.

I travel quite a bit for work so it takes a lot for me to want to get up and out of the house for a flight. CDMX was only 3.5 hours away from LAX but (the same as Chicago!) but worlds away in terms of culture and adventure. Flights were cheap - only $300 round trip from LAX, and lodging and food were similarly affordable.

Speaking of food: even if you don't like sightseeing and cool stuff you should go for the food. Ohhhh the food. I loved the food so much. I would eat it every day if I could because it is glorious. I would probably have to mix in some salads because based on my experiences I am not sure my body can handle Tacos al Pastor for dinner every night. :-/

I was there the weekend before Dia de los Muertos so there were many festivals and a parade and decorations everywhere. That was a good and fun time to go, so if you're not doing anything at the end of next October and feel like taking a trip let me know, maybe we can check it out.

CDMX: Highly recommended.

People Are Awful: Mass Shooting in Texas

In the less than 24 hours since my last post went live there was another mass murder, this time in a small Texas town.

In my post yesterday, I said:

However, there are many, many people with ready access to the guns used by the Vegas shooter. The only thing preventing more of those types of mass murders is basic human decency.

It turns out that human decency was in short supply when (another) white male decided to go on a killing spree today.

This happened in one of the most gun-friendly states in the Union, so there is no chance that they will enact any type of meaningful gun control legislation. These people's lives (and the lives of their loved ones), are just the cost of doing business. Also, these types of murders represent only a small fraction of the total number across the country. Despite what you see on the news almost all gunshot victims die one at a time, from handguns.

Guns are too easy to buy and own across the country, and we as a society can and should do something about it. It it easier to buy a gun than it is to get a Cosmetology license. Can we maybe make it at least as difficult to get a gun as it is to learn to cut someone's hair? That would be progress.

Banning guns completely is a non-starter, as it makes the people dependent on the state for protection. That is a mistake, because the state is not going to protect you (it does not protect you in countries where guns are banned - you will always be at the mercy of someone more powerful than you unless you have a force equalizer). There is a middle ground, and we could get there if the gun lobby and gun control advocates were able to have a reasonable exchange. Maybe someday.

Gun Control is Overdue: Ban Bump-Fire Stocks Already

After an elderly white male in Nevada killed 59 people and physically injured around 500 more with a collection of military rifles, some of which were equipped with 'bump-fire' stocks. These stocks enable you to use the recoil of the gun to simulate full-auto fire. According to the Washington Post the shooter had 23 guns in his hotel room, at least a dozen of which were AR-15 style rifles with bump stocks. (Note that 23 guns is 20 more guns than you need to do what he did, about which more shortly.)

A friend of mine that hunts and shoots recreationally asked me what I thought of bump-fire stocks a while back. I said that they were stupid toys, and not for serious shooters; they are strictly for clowns and/or novices. The stocks cannot be accurately aimed, and as such serve no purpose except to dump a bunch of rounds aimlessly downrange. This is exactly what the murderer in Las Vegas did, and it is exactly why those kinds of toys should be thrown in the trash forever.

There was a great outcry in the gun community about the NRA agreeing not to obstruct a ban on bump-fire stocks. The NRA has since walked back that agreement, and the repugnant, idiot CEO of the NRA has gone on the offensive, blaming, among others, the "Hollywood, television, gaming industry". Not sure which of those things drove the shooter to stockpile so many guns, aim them at defenseless civilians, and mow them down in great numbers, but I would venture to say that if he did not have a gun it would have been much harder to do. It would have been somewhat harder to do had he not had ready access to devices that serve no purpose beyond turning money into noise.

The Las Vegas shooter was the perfect storm of amateurism and mental illness. He had a very limited grasp of the proper equipment required to accomplish his terrorist attack, and his compulsive behavior is more common than you might think in 'two is one and one is none' shooting circles. He did not need "at least 12" AR-15 style rifles to shoot a bunch of unarmed, unprotected civilians. At most he might need four guns, and then only because the AR-15 is not designed for sustained rapid fire like a proper air- or water-cooled machine gun. The gun gets too hot and either the gas tube melts (in a direct impingement gun) or the barrel overheats (gas-piston gun) and the rounds start to tumble or 'keyhole'. (This second issue was maybe irrelevant for someone not concerned with aimed fire, but who knows.)

Why did the shooter have so many guns in his hotel room? Because he was fucking nuts.

Your typical combat rifle (I reject the term 'assault rifle', as should you, because it is ignorant and imprecise) is a very practical tool for hunting many different animals (if that's your thing) or to protect yourself or someone you love (if that's your thing). It is designed to inflict harm, which is what almost all guns have been designed to do since they were invented in the 14th century.

****
Since I first started this draft a couple weeks ago the Las Vegas shooting has fallen so far off the front page that you cannot even find it should you go looking. That is a concern, because the Vegas shooting is much more relevant to the national discourse than the Newtown massacre. There very few autistic, hyper-violent, over-indulged teenagers whose mom will buy them weapons of war and then give them the keys to the gun cabinet.

However, there are many, many people with ready access to the guns used by the Vegas shooter. The only thing preventing more of those types of mass murders is basic human decency. I would prefer if we could make it more difficult for insane people to commit those types of violent acts. I think that we can do that without compromising anyone's right to self-defense and personal protection, and the first step is by banning bump-fire stocks completely. It will do nothing to reduce the gun violence in the United States, but it is past time that we did something about making it so easy for insane people to inflict harm on others.

Don't Steal Shit

I had a couple bikes stolen at UCSB. I got both of them back later, and while it did not make up for the tremendous frustration I felt when my bikes were stolen, I remember the recovery events with fondness.

So this thing should bring a lot of people great joy, and I wish them luck.

BTW, the cops are not at all interested in recovering your stolen bike in Isla Vista. Too hard to prove, too hard to prosecute. Fight crime? lol why would they do that? They could not care less. All they want to do is write tickets for MIP's, DIP's, and open containers. Those are revenue generating opportunities.

Go Do This: MDTS Practical Shotgun for Home Defense

AAR for MDTS Practical Shotgun for Home Defense
Course date: 30/31 Sept/1 Oct
Instructors: Chris Fry and Bill Aprill
Gear required: A working shotgun; your brain
Rating: Five stars (out of five)

I took an excellent class over the weekend; I cannot recommend it highly enough. The instructor runs classes all over the country, and if you are at all interested in improving your mental and physical approach to your (and/or your family's) safety then you should attend. The only reason not to participate is if you already know that you are not the type of person that would use a firearm to defend yourself in a life or death situation. In that instance you should focus on techniques that are better suited to your abilities.

MDTS is run by Chris Fry, based out of upstate New York. He travels around the country doing trainings for firearms, edged weapons, and unarmed self-defense. Chris was joined by William Aprill, of ARC, who runs his own training programs down in New Orleans. Together they delivered a curriculum that covered both the mechanics of shooting a shotgun and, more importantly, the mindset you must cultivate to protect yourself from violent criminal actors, up to and including using deadly force in your home. As a special bonus, Bill Aprill did extensive lecturing on the mindset of violent criminal actors: where they come from, what they want, and provided the students with anecdotes backed up by hard data accrued during his career in both mental health and law enforcement.

I did not know the first thing about these guys when I registered for the class. I signed up because they were recommended by Craig Douglas. He is an awesome instructor, so anyone that is approved to work with him is likely to be good. Not only that, they will likely have a cerebral, intelligent approach to the hard truths of self defense and personal protection in a low-pressure environment.

That is the best course summary I can offer you: a cerebral, intelligent approach to shotgun home defense, which includes an excellent lecture course on violence and criminality. To do this kind of thing on your own you would have to read The Gift of Fear, and then read Meditations On Violence, and then read Thinking, Fast and Slow, and then read Sources of Power, then read a great many more books that I cannot remember because they are not already sitting on my bookshelf right now, and then spend thousands of hours studying and talking to violent criminals, and also spend thousands of hours practicing your weapon mechanics. Or you can take advantage of seasoned professionals and use their knowledge to your advantage. (Still have to practice your weapon mechanics though.)

I have been fortunate in that I have been able to take many shooting classes over the years. This is the most useful, most applicable, and most valuable of all. Useful and applicable because the information about mindset and criminal actors can be used and applied during every waking moment of your life. The gun mechanics are useful and valuable because you learn skills that you may actually have to employ. (This is a contrast to the long-gun courses and handgun courses that you might take - they are fun but they are really just LARPing for guys that like molle webbing - you will never, ever do that shit IRL.)

The value of these real-world, readily applicable skills cannot be overstated. You should take this class. It is a superb way to learn skills that will keep you and your loved ones more safe.

See you out there.

That's Not Where That Goes

Rather Have This On the Wheel and On the Bike TBH

Why do I have a rear cassette (Shimano Ultegra R8000 11-32, if you must know) sitting on my desk? Don't those things belong on a bike? Wellllll it turns out that if you have a mental episode splurge on some super-sweet wheels* to put on your super-sweet bicycle and you don't read the directions about maximum tire pressure during tire installation you might have a Negative Outcome. And by that I mean they might crack at the valve stem. I needed a place to store my cassette until my new wheels got back from the vendor, and there it is. Just pointing all this out in the event it ever happens to you.

I had originally thought that the wheels were defective (and they may have been), but I probably contributed to their demise when I inflated the tubeless tire to seat the bead and exceeded the specified maximum tire pressure. (The bead is the part that touches the rim and seals. It is very tight in tubeless tires; it has to be in order to keep the air from spilling out.) This may be more information than you need, but the important part is that the prohibitively expensive, hand-made-in-the-USA carbon fiber wheel cracked before I even put it on the bike. The other wheel leaked badly from the valve stem during inflation and installation of the sealant, so it was a goddamn debacle all the way around. Though it eventually sealed it did not seem like it should have happened - the wheel that cracked did not leak at all.

The only good news about this whole thing was that I still had the boxes when I went to return them, and the vendor (wheelbuilder.com) was phenomenal. They handled my returns and warranty and rebuilt my wheels extremely quickly. Enve was also extremely apologetic, and I think it is probably the first time ever I had a c-level executive address an issue with a product I bought. They took my issue seriously and handled it no questions asked. Official word is that early versions of the wheel may have had some issues at the valve stem, but they have been resolved, and with a five year warranty you can buy with confidence.

Do I need prohibitively expensive, pro-level, hand-made-in-the-USA carbon fiber wheels on my bike? Fuck no! I do not need almost all of the shit I buy. But the groupset I want to put on the bike (Ultegra R8020) is not available in the states yet. So, here we are. I could have opted out after the unpleasantness detailed above, but one of the nice things about being a party of one is that I can allocate my resources however I choose. (Could also have switched to the main competing brand, but I do not like the branding, and the last time a rich white guy passed me on the bike path without responding to my friendly greeting he was on Zipps, and I refuse to ride the same wheels as that asshole. Also the patented dimpling seems like pure ::wanking motion:: to me. YMMV)

* Wheels: Enve SES 4.5 AR Disc; hubs: Chris King R45D in 'jette' aka matte black; bladed spokes: I forget which brand (DT Swiss?), but also in matte black; Hutchinson Sector 28 tires; orange seal sealant

Dirty Faces Win Races

Peter Sagan was a legend before this race, and he put a nice exclamation point on his legend here.

Winning a six and a half hour (!!) cycling race is not about proving who is the strongest, it is about proving who can win a six and a half hour cycling race. It takes skill, nous, luck, and legs and heart and lungs and will of iron. Sagan has all of these things in spades, and they are on glorious display here.

He rode a strong race, got a bit lucky to get close, and found a way to win. It gets no better.

Hot Jamzs: Trip the Light by Kaz James

Big Cheese sent this along and it's got a good vibe. Long mix so it takes a few minutes to get started. The radio edit, if one exists, would skip that part.

Bespoke Jersey is Best Jersey

Same Colors as a Chewy Peppermint Christmas Candy

Along with the bike you need stuff to wear while riding. That means padded tights, which do not have pockets. And also jerseys, which (conveniently) do have pockets. I am no big fan of wearing tights in public but if you want to ride there is no way around it. I will never be that guy at the local coffee shop tromping around in clipless pedals and tights but as long as I am just out the door, riding, and then home with no intermediate stops then I am okay with it.

Finding cycling gear that isn't lame and ugly is tougher than you might think. Or maybe not, because if you even noticed almost any road cyclist you probably only noticed them because their outfit was ugly af. If you can find something that is decent (more on that shortly), you then have to find something that fits. This is even harder than finding something decent to wear, especially if you regularly lift anything heavier than your 8 Kg road bike. (Why are road cyclists so obsessed with weight? Because if the bike is too heavy they are afraid they might not be able to pick it up. OR: What's the hardest part about learning to ride in a peloton? Asking your dad to lift your bike into the truck. To be fair this is perhaps a bit much because cyclocross riders frequently lift their bikes and run with them and then jump back on again, but you get the idea.)

If you have shoulders then fit is problematic. Partly because I do not have a 'cyclists build', and partly because the hot thing in cycling these days is to be as aero as possible. Marginal gains and all that. So not only do the jerseys tend have narrow shoulders to start with, but, depending on what you buy, they are designed to be very tight.

So you found something that fits (maybe), what do you do about the graphics? While most of the designs you notice are butt, there are happily a few decent offerings from both affordable and premium brands. Or you can get creative and build your own. It is very easy to build custom from scratch and then order it online, as in this post and the one immediately below. There is a lot of overlap in the snob craft beer culture and the snob cycling culture so I enjoy the idea of having a not-cool beer jersey to ride on my supposedly not-cool bike. (My bike is polarizing because it has a suspension in the front, which gives traditionalists the vapors.)

I saw some California-themed jerseys out and about and they were okay, but not as good as one you could design in half an hour if, for example, you already had plenty of practice trolling the internet for Miller Lite logos and pasting them onto a color-themed template.

No plans to do a custom order on the jerseys any time soon, but if you want to then get your order in now because the price drops dramatically as you increase the quantity. You have my number.

YMMV: Likeness by Lawless, feat. Little Ashes

I heard this jam and I thought it was good. It's got that epic feel. You might dig it, or you might not. You do you.

Also heard recently that riding a bike 'brings color and joy to the world'. Riding a motorcycle does the same thing. You should do one or the other or both.

Overdoing It

You Know You Want One

So it turns out that if you have not ridden a bicycle in a serious way for over 25 years and you get a new bicycle and decide to ride it in a serious way then you are almost certainly going to hurt something. It is possible that you will not, such as if you stopped cycling when you were 2, but even then: the body needs some time to adjust after a long time away. 

For example, if you get a totally awesome new road bike that you think is the dope shit and start logging miles because the bike is awesome and rad and riding around on it is awesome and rad then you will very probably get sore knees, which is decidedly not awesome and/or rad. In less temperate climes than the type I enjoy here in lovely Southern California they call this condition 'spring knee', because riders would be drawn outside and begin to ride more as the weather warmed. You can ride 365 days a year where I live so I just call it "sore knees that are bad and hurtful" or "hurtful knees", for short. The struggle is real. 

The hurtful knees are definitely cramping my style, so I have had to scale back my riding and do more (a lot more) to loosen the angry, angry quads in an effort to ameliorate my condition. Pro cyclists get a massage after every stage of every race, and also after almost every workout (must be nice). That's not in the budget, so I have been spending some quality time with a roller and a supernova ball. It's not much better but it's not worse. You care. Soon I will be back on the roads and looking good while going slow. I have a lot more words about looking good on the bike, but that will be another post. Get excited. 

Two Wheels Good

Click to Enlargen

The past couple weeks have been very busy. I was in San Ramon for work one week, and then San Francisco for work the following week, and then Boulder, CO for work the week after that. SF and Boulder were cool but yeah I don't care to talk about it either.

What I do care to talk about is this new thing that I'm doing that gets me out of the house. I am back on two wheels on the regular! Except now I have to provide the motive power in addition to the steering/braking inputs.

This here is a Specialized Roubaix in the best color they offer (black), which is the color I brought home. My bike is a different than this one in that the groupset is not as high-end as the one pictured here, so the one I bought cost quite a bit less. That is good news because it functions the same and I had a lot of other ancillary stuff to buy. Like pedals. And tights. And the shirts with pockets on the back. And a helmet. (Borrowed one from my friend but you are supposed to get a new one after 3 years and his was 10 years old.) And a little computer to track your data. So much data. Fortunately I had shoes left over from when I did spin class several years ago - shoes are expensive. Actually all of it is expensive, because cycling overlaps demographically very heavily with golf.

Cycling is very much a rich, middle-aged white guy hobby. I am not rich, but I do not have kids and I have the middle-aged white guy thing on lock. The big question is whether or not my back will hold up. So far it's okay. Not great, but okay. That will have to do for now.

More to come as I get caught up on the book reviews and maybe, if you're lucky, politics. Get excited.

Retro Style

In creating the post on Ready Player One (see below) I got sucked into a rabbit hole of 80's references, Gotcha shorts, and, happily, some pretty great retro OP polos.

Thanks to the internet some of this stuff is not too hard to find, and some of it is reasonably priced. If it fit me I would pay $40 plus shipping for this sweatshirt (that stripe! that collar! 100% cotton!). Some of it is expensive; not sure I would pay $80 for a shirt made 30 years ago - I would attempt to find a modern equivalent, but at least it is interesting.

Full disclosure: this is the last sweatshirt I bought, so YMMV. The thing about buying a garment like that is unless you lose it or let some girl 'borrow' it then it is likely to be the last sweatshirt you ever buy. That is one of the reasons they don't make them like they used to - the other is that loopwheeled shirts are very expensive to make, especially if you pay your employees a decent living wage like they do in Japan. Still: it will last as long as you do, which is saying something. I got mine because it reminded me of the same garment that my grandfather used to wear when I was a kid. He had gotten several on the cheap in the late 40's and wore them for decades. You can do the same: browse the collection at the History Preservation Associates and buy yourself a hoodie that will last a lifetime. You deserve it.

Not Bad for an Afternoon: Ready Player One by Ernest Cline

Just because a lot of people like something does not mean it is good. (See: McDonalds food; Game of Thrones books; Big Bang Theory; etc.) That said, Ready Player One is a fun, easy-readying story with some cringey flat spots and occasionally horrendous dialog that will keep you entertained for the few hours it will take you to finish it. I think it will do very well as a movie, because the script writers will be able to even out the low points and punch up the weakest elements (the romantic storyline and dialog are, and I cannot overstate this, spectacularly awful) while keeping the parts of the story that make it compelling.

That the author's second novel resorts to the same first-person trope as the first suggests that he may be out of ideas. Or that he is a hack. Or both. He definitely seems like a hack in this novel, but it succeeds in spite of itself.

Highly recommended for: anyone that played a lot of atari in the 80's; anyone that spent time in front of an arcade cabinet at the local 7-11 on the way home from school in the 80's; anyone who knows the serial number for the original star trek Enterprise; anyone who owned a 20-sided die and prayed for a vorpal sword + 5; anyone who enjoys references to the classic that was the Last Starfighter.

History Lesson: Liberty or Death by Peter McPhee

Liberty or Death really good! It is overflowing with detail so if you want to just get the gist of it you can get the kindle version and read the middle chapter that summarizes all the authors theses. Or if you can get your hands on a summary or abstract at a discount that might be good too. 

I read the whole thing and while the overarching themes are easy to recall there are many dates and places that are lost to me; it turns out that I do not need to remember the exact dates for the various revolutions, counter-revolutions, wars, internecine conflicts, and terrors that swept through France between 1789 and 1798. The big picture stuff is quite enough. 

This book overlaps well with Capital in the Twenty-First Century in that some of the root causes of the French Revolution are directly attributable to economic inequality, and Piketty explores them in some detail in his magnum opus. 

Full length book recommended for history buffs. Abstract or abbreviated version highly recommended for everyone else. 

I Read This: The Transcriptionist by Amy Rowland

Sweet Katie was kind enough to share this book with me. I read it and I didn't get it. The story about a woman having what seems to be a mental breakdown. The meta-stories are about aging, mid-life crises, careers, 'love', newspapers, and probably some other stuff I did not pick up on. It is an easy book to read, but not a very easy book to understand. What I did understand I did not think was interesting.

I do not do well with books that have unreliable narrators, and that is a core element of this novel. SK liked the book, and she is a good and smart person that reads a lot, so I think there is a good read in there if that type of book is your jam. It is very audience dependent. Read it and decide for yourself.

Caught Up in You by 38 Special

Please press the play button and soak this scorching hot all time classic slice of pop perfection into your face. DO IT.

Two drummers? TWO DRUMMERS. You might want to go dance around a little, blow some rails (that was a thing in the 80's), sing along, or just watch the period-correct video and try to figure out which of those people you would have been if you were that age in 1982. (I'm the guy playing video games and drinking beers, obvs. Talk to girls? Fuck no. Why would I do that?)

Based on video evidence we can infer that many other things were hella dope back in the day: pay phones (lol), chest fur (on the men), tight ass jeans (men and women), shirts that are at least two sizes too small (men, and still a thing today), t-shirts tucked in with a belt (what the actual fuck?), hot blonde bitches playing you for free beers (also still a thing today). Not a thing back in the day? Bras, apparently. I'm not saying I'm into the look, but I'm not not saying it.

This song came out in 1982. Let that sink in for a minute. Some of my younger readers were not even born yet. The last girl I went out with wouldn't be born for another five years(!). Point is, this is an old song. Related: I am old. You're probably old too! How did this happen? No idea. Not much to say about it except this song makes me forget about being old for a few minutes. Actually, it does not make me forget. It just makes me not care for a few minutes. Two very different things, but it will have to do for now. At least until Destiny 2 comes out.

See you on the dance floor.

Weeks and Weeks

Started some blog posts but they were not good. Even adjusting for lowered standards and long delays between content. I work, read books, do my PT, do my other hobbies (baking, watching League of Legends on youtube, and baking while watching League on youtube). Just trying to make my way in the world, same as you.

Here then is a very good ambient theme song from a movie (Sunshine) that started out promisingly and took a left turn into bullshit. Get down with some instrumental feels. Or not.

Around the time that this movie came out (2007) I worked with a person that I nicknamed 'Sunshine'. She was an aggressively cheerful and hilariously incompetent person. She worked in my department for about 3 years and she was good for some type of issue or challenge around once a month. The issues varied from wearing pajamas to work to having a nervous breakdown and needing to take a leave of absence. (Though these two things mayyyy have been related in some way.) When she had her final extended meltdown/leave and the company told her to take as long as she liked but to not plan on returning I took over her job duties. The saddest part about her issues was that she hardly did any work at all, and she still could not handle it.

The funniest part about her leaving was that IT gave me her computer so that I could access her files, and her password was "happiness". Sunshine, indeed.

Heavy Reading: Bloodlands by Timothy Snyder

I finished Bloodlands a while back and have been processing, or, more accurately, attempting to process, the content ever since. Snyder paints a vivid account of the scale of the civilian and non-combatant slaughter in the territories between Germany and Russia that occurred between 1933 and 1945.

Is it the heaviest book ever written in English? Given the scope and scale of the material I think it might be. We have the benefit of contemporary firsthand accounts, and the numbers are overwhelming beyond human comprehension.

When you read that Stalin killed over 750,000 people in his great purges of 1937 and 1938, how do you wrap your head around that? If you read that Stalin starved over three million (!!) Ukrainians to death as part of his collectivization strategy in 1932/33 then what does that mean? Do you get caught up in the details of death by starvation, which are so harrowing I do not even want to reproduce them here? Or do you imagine what it would be like if all of San Jose (1.0 million), Dallas (1.3 million) and San Diego (1.4 million) were starved to death? What would that look like?

Once you get past Stalin's successful mass murders - if you can - then you come to Hitler, whose army and their compatriots killed even more civilians and POWs in a shorter span of time. The accounts of Hitler's/Germany's victims are every bit as horrible as anything that Stalin and his teams could design.

Though a difficult read, this is essential history, and I cannot recommend it highly enough.